typo(s), tendency and text

Last weekend I attended the SIGINT conference in Cologne, and moderated the panel "Women and geek culture. Whats the problem, guys?". The idea was to explain and show what situations and settings manifest parts of geek culture as excluding women. Although the four panelists and I did come from different feminisms, or at least draw different conclusions, we did not want to give a theoretical overview over feminisms, nor did we intend to discuss them scholarly. The women* on the panel wanted to contribute with what they encounter and wanted to give an idea of how spaces and groups can be inclusive. Of course, it would have been difficult to cover all areas of geekery, so we focused on gaming, education, workplace, conferences and hackerspaces. We thought 105 minutes would be a lot, but in the end we only had 15 minutes for discussion.

While the video that has been recorded will not be ready for next weeks as we heard, I would like to reply on some points of criticism, and react on some very stereotypical antifeminist "criticism".

The discussion during Q&A was very well on the topic, and positively interested. While we got questions, we were informed that the discussion on twitter that had been going on while we were talking, was mixed at best. In a recap of the twitter search for #SIGINT for the time of the panel, I got the impression, that some people have accidentally or because of bias not heard what we said. At least as I recall it, we gave lots of disclaimers, like saying that we come with different experiences, have different angles and are in different communities. That we would like to talk about sexists, which can be male and female, and that there are men who can be feminists. That we have different feminist theories and practices. We still wanted to talk about problems we meet when interacting in geek groups and spaces. While having in mind that woman* is not the only potentially excluding factor, and that there is a set of "others" aka non-white, non-male, non-ablebodied, not-young, non-rich people that can be excluded from groups such as in geek culture.

Something, that went very wrong, was someone sending this tweet, and it being retweeted several times. It says: "So. Now 10 breasts are talking about feminism... #Sigint" by fussl.

This was unneccessary at best. It objectified the people on the panel, reduced us to our body parts. The only explanation I got from the guy who retweeted this from his friend fussl, was that it was an accurate thing to say. I especially called him on his panel-related tweeting, because it was not only resentful and wrong, but also because he had been one of the people who initiated the process to get a talk or action on gender (in)equality and feminism on the SIGINT. After initiating he never got really verbose about what he wanted and how it would be achievable. All in all the mailing list conversation was uffering from all the people being undermotivated or having little time to put some effort into getting something handed in to the organizers of the conference. Close to the deadline of the CfP, Svenja and I handed something in, all the time informing the list and giving people time to react. Noone cared.

So, after the panel, I was wondering if I should confront the guy, or if I should just ignore him. I less decided, than acted on an impulse and asked him to tell me that stuff he twittered again, and face to face. Here is what he came up with (said in my words, from memory:

1. It was not wrong to tweet the breast-tweet. Because the panelists all have breasts, because women have them.

WRONG. In which universe is it okay to objectify people and reduce them, and what they say to their body parts. Even if the inital tweet was not meant like that, a slip, the multiple retweets of it made it impossible for us to feel like what we say is taken seriously. Also, breasts can't talk. Also, in which universe do most men not have breasts? And nipples? How so is having breasts significant when talking about feminism? I could go on, but I won't and I didn't.

2. He does not give square about gender or gender roles and we did too little explaining and acted as women so we didn't deconstruct our gender enough.

WRONG. Obviously he does not give up his gender role (how would one, this is difficult and you would at least need to make an attempt). And for making a statement like that, you would have to know people on the panel better. How the frakk could we who were sitting up there show our non-binary gender identity to people, who obviously can do nothing but define us into the binaries? Before we even start talking? Also, why in hell are we obliged to give a freakshow? And since when is "femme" not a valid play on gender roles? So, I beg you pardon, but we really don't have to strip our personalities and our innards or outwards to you just to prove you that we really are circus freaks. Period.

The main problem with gender binaries is, that you are constantly being thrown back to them, whether you want to or not. And if you come into spaces or groups, that are (mostly) by tradition, society or self-defined male spaces (because they deal with science, machines and computers). So, if we are treated as women there, and women are treated in specific ways, we have all rights in the world to talk about it. Actually, more than half of the people on stage are defining as queer, if we choose to participate in a panel like that, and we choose the topic and what we want to say, we have our reasons. And the right to do so. You can actually not think any part of queer theories or debates without the existence of feminism, antisexist and antiracist theories and practice.

3. Putting pictures of naked, beauty standard women in ASCII art on the wall of the hackcenter (or any other temporary or permanent hackerspace) was a display of art, and should not be critisized. Also, think about how huge the porn collections on the guys' computers are, this is nothing. This is an act of consent, and for some magic reason consent means majority vote as soon as there is no consent anymore.

WRONG. Even though it might be art, showing it in a place where a minority of women* come, is potentially excluding them. Saying this was an act of consent means there is a democratic poll every minute another person walks in. If someone disagrees, and is not listened to, they are being defined out of the group. So, if a woman disagrees, she is not part of the group anymore. This is excluding and sexist. Now, to me the ASCII naked woman was not particularly excluding, though I liked the "looong cat" better. But someone did not feel comfortable, and so the picture should be taken down. Because it is not a "boys room", but a room for everybody.

Also, calling me on naivety, really? Of course, you boys are all supposed to have huge pr0n collections, and I am supposed to be a "sex-positive" feminist, and if not, to shut up. I don't think, feminism has ever been "sex-negative". And being called for naive is certainly not a first for feminists. Any feminist, actually. This would actually be a rant in itself. However, watching pr0n does not make you a hacker. Hacking does. Critical thinking does. Listening to others and learning from them, and applying knowledge to form something new spectacular, does. Inspiring each other to reach new aims, does make you a hacker. So why don't you try to read up a little on feminist criticism on the topic (aka RTFM), and try not to make a hackerspace exclude less-privileged (by society and groups) "other-than-you's"? What you watch in private on your computer is your deal, while what you show in public or semi-public spaces concerns everyone who enters. Is that so hard to understand?

I feel like I could go on and on. I'll leave it at that, and maybe contribute in comments or write more posts if I feel like it.

Let me just once more thank the volunteer group organizing this community-driven event to give us the stage to talk about this topic. Special thanks to Nika, who really supported us contentwise and with practicalities. I hear there have been lots of thinking about and discussions on the panel afterwards, and that makes me really happy we did this. Also thanks to Heather, Ella, Leena and Svenja to get up there together with me and talk about the F-word. More blogging about this at I heart digital life.

So, the good news on ebooks. The Gutenberg Project has vast resources of free ebooks for shich the copyright has expired. You can get all sorts of formats there. Both the nook and the Kindle (afaik) accept non-DRM ebooks in pdf, the nook also in epub-format. There is alo the Baen Free Library for Science Fiction books. Feedbooks and FreeTechBooks are other resources for free books. Wikibooks is a project from Wikipedia.

There are many books available for students who looks for free textbooks. Ask your public or academic library for advice on their databases and which books or article could be relevant to your research. In Norway there is an excellent service with volunteering librarians who answer your questions via phone, email or chat - and most recently also facebook and twitter. It is called Biblioteksvar.

The synchronizing of content that doesn't come from the store your device is locked to, can, however, be a pain. Calibre is a tool that can help you there. The software collects all your ebooks in a library, you can convert them to other formats and push them to your reader when it's connected via USB. Calibre has also predefined tasks of collecting news from feeds, converting them to easily readable ebooks, and pushing the daily news to your device. This works for Google Reader and ReadItLater, too.

The nook is root- and hackable. It runs Android, and if you follow the instructions of the nookdevs, some neighborly concerned Android hackers, you can get around some of the nasty restrictions when you have bought a nook and want to use it outside of the U.S. It voids your warranty, though. You get a web and file browser, a feed reader and lots of other functionality. Someone has even started developing a twitter client, Twook. You will also get the chance to get familiar and comfortable with the Android SDK, and you should be comfortable about using the command line to do all this.

I recently have become the owner of an e-book-reader. The "nook", which is developed and sold by Barnes & Nobles. I have been hesitating for a very long time if I should buy such a device, and which one. What has been putting me in this position is not that I don't have use for it. Nor that I can't pay for it. Seen from a capitalist market POV, this makes me a customer.

What has been putting me in this position, and what continues to be a great problem for me in acquiring ebooks in a "white" market way, is: DRM on ebooks. The decision-makers in the publishing industry who are dinosaurs. Who think they can decide for me what I can read on which screen, in which manner and on which medium.

I like paper. I really do. I am a big fan of paper hacks, book binding and paper as a note taking tool. But my fandom only bears so far. I do not wish to carry a big stack of heavy paper books with me when I am traveling, which I do. Or when moving. I do not wish to break my back, or the backs of my helpers. Not every book is worth reading twice, and when it comes to design and typesetting only very few books are that beautiful that you want to collect them because typesetter, printers and book binders have done such a good work. So the ever so often sigh of librarians ("but, what happens to the books!"), well... Let's just say, I am not very worried.

So, why the nook. Right now there are only two devices to my knowledge that feature what is important for me in an ebook reader on the market. (Like, really on the market, not long waiting lists for especially interested people.) Both the Amazon Kindle, and the Barnes & Noble nook have wifi and 3G capability. Both of them have a long battery life when reading, and both seems to be somewhat longlasting. Also, both of them have e-ink screens. (I consider the iPad to be crippleware and not an ebook due to little battery capacity and backlighting. I like shiny devices. But not this one so far.)

I like the nook better, simply because he has a touch screen instead of a keyboard. And because he runs with Android as OS, which also runs on my phone. Although I do not wholeheartedly agree with Google on development decisions and privacy issues, Android is pretty great when it comes to smart phones. Its somewhat open character makes problems set by Google and carriers circumventable.

What made me hesitate to buy either of the two devices, was the decision of the two book stores (and others along with them) and the book publishers to lock down the reading material as much as possible. Every ebook you can buy on Amazon are only readable on the Kindle reader. And you can only buy ebooks from Barnes & Noble if you have a US IP adress and a US billing adress.

Of course, there are other book stores. But a lot of pubishers have said no to selling their material outside the US. I fail to find the appropriate words for this stupidity. I am still looking for ways to buy books. Not to talk about checking out ebooks in a library. Apparently inhabitants of Denmark and Sweden can already do that. But in Norway, librarians and politicians are still busy with letting themselves get scared off by the lobbyists of publishing houses.

I don't want to be locked to Amazon. I buy the occasional book there,
because they have almost everything. I knew before about how tightly the Kindle is linked to Amazon. But experiencing how you really can't use any book that they offer in their store on your *reader, whatever reader that might be, made me really angry. And sure, there are ways of circumventing the lockdown of the Barnes & Noble store. But I ask: why should they be able to do that? Why should publishers and book stores be allowed to be so strict? Why would anyone want to prevent someone from reading a book. Let alone a book he or she wants to purchase?

Ebooks can be a great device for students, people with problems in reading can increase the font size to their liking. If people have their books with them, they will have so many good reading experiences, it could actually make reading popular. Or at least better apprehensible for those with attention deficits. You have a full-fledged full text search at your finger tip with every book that you read. What kind of information society locks down reading of books?

People, some of them librarians or teachers, are worried that people read less books now that there is the internet. Well, do you have to kill trees and emit lots of chlorine in the water, not to speak about the resources used for Transportation of physical books? Only to read a texts longer then 20 pages in a proper more or less linear manner?

Even if you are not against DRM in general. Trust me: You don't want DRM on ebooks.

PIXELS by PATRICK JEAN.
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And here I would like to have an animated, blinking gif. But I don't. Yes, there is not much more to say. I won NaNoWriMo, not a second to late, but rather a day early. As I am writing this, I am sitting in the Piksel Hut in Bergen, where I and some guys from the HackBergen group meet to do an Open Hack Day. The other three are working on their electronics projects, I was writing. And am now celebrating my big winning moment with them and my many far away friends. This happens not just-in-time, but whenever they read what I have posted on various social web services.

I managed to write 50250 words. There is still a lot to do about the text for it to become a novel: The spaceship in part two has not landed yet. And I haven't even started on writing part three, where my vampire is going to be a space traveller.

I loved this challenge, and I hated it. But I mostly loved it, and want to thank the people who have organized NaNoWriMo for the tenth time in a row. It is an awesome way of getting started with writing of longer texts. I was anxious, and every time I got back to writing after work or daily chores, (or simply slacking) I was anxious again. The challenge to pull off writing so many words in short time, makes the anxiety count less. You have an aim, and you know you can reach it. And you also know, that there are loads of people doing the same thing at the same time.

Now, if this text will become a novel there i still a lot of work to do, research, rewriting, editing, writing more. Planning the plot couldn't hurt, either. But I learned a lot only by doing this. And that was exactly my plan. Now I have more questions that I can ask, topics on the craft that I can explore. Before it would have been a theoretical thing, now its close to something that I have done before. I'd like to thank everybody who encouraged me, and everybody who ignored my tweets about this even though there were really boring.

I can not find the words for how happy I am that I started this project. I get lost in epic descriptions, waste time on getting new ideas where the plot and some minor sub plots should go, but it is just so glad that I get to explore my prose writing abilities. They are not the highest, as of now. But I know that I can trust my inner instincts of what might be bad for future writing projects. And that I can trust my insecurity about some things as an indicator on what I should work on. Running through this process is, not least, a great help in not stopping to think too much and work myself up over all these aspects the "inner editor" or "inner critic" (as NaNoWriMo-ers are referring to those insecurities), and just keep on writing.

One good example to mention would be: I sent my main character and two of her friend on a journey with a pirate ship in a post-apocalyptic future. Now, I don't know anything about sea navigation and steering a ship (well, at least for big ships), so I took what I knew, and just sort of drafted the rest around it, to get to the really important point, where the main character had to sort out important trust problems with another character. Knowing that I could find out about this stuff afterwards, and tat I could just take what I needed, to research and add the correct details someday maybe at a later time in the project, gave me the drive to get over the self criticism. Criticism is important, but it should never get beyond the point where i stops or hinders you in doing good/important things. Not being to hard on myself there, is a good experience, that I hope I can take with me beyond NaNoWriMo time.

I got past 40k word count-wise. In other words: 80 percent of the project is complete. I can only state again, what I said earlier. Stopping now would be insane.

Yes, the days before the conference were all about writing, writing, writing. I broke 20k before the conference, and was two days of writing ahead.  Since then I am one day behind, which I try to catch up on today, before next week begins. I also have to wash clothes, and exercise. Sitting in office chairs, or sleeping are the only activities these days - and they are taking their toll on my wellbeing.

But I made a wordcloud on wordle, and you can have a neak peak at the most important words in my novel-ish marathon text.

Oh, yes. I am writing in german.

Friday I was just plain lazy. Very typical "thank god its friday" kind of thing, I just stranded in front of my screen watching "Fringe", "The Vampire Diaries" and "The Sarah Jane Adventures". I did not write a single word. So today, again, I had to catch up on writing of two days NaNoWriMos worth. I managed doing that being on the IRC channel (#nanowrimo on irc.goodchatting.com) fighting word wars together with others against ourselves.

The IRC bot BattleJesus is serving us with the scenery for it, where we word fighters join a war with a command, and BattleJesus  tells us that we are on the war. That it is 60 second until he war. That it begins. That we are halfway through, That we are 3/4 through. And that the word war is over. Then you can tell BatteJesus the wordcount you managed to pull, and you are done. Save & backup, not to forget. That way I managed to keep up, even though I tidied and cleaned the whole appartment & had an epic afternoon nap, and procrastinated some more. Heck, I even wrote two blogposts!

A good friend of mine decided to spent one of his precious invitations for the Google Wave Sandbox on me. Expectations to that new service were high after  seeing a video that promised to reinvent email, wiki, personal pages, IM as communications channels, and renew them in a way that made things easier, more collaborative and not as fractioned anymore.

I have tried it, and I must say that my expectations were not met. Without all the bots now flooding Google Wave, wave is somehow a very slow realtime web-based Multi-User-Chat. My first thought was: This looks a little bit like the realtime chat-feature in that dinosaur ICQ version from almost ten years ago. Only in colour, and with maps, and...Well, probably not bad after all.

Another expectation is also not yet met: Wave being an open protocol, based on XMPP, which enables everyone to set up their own wave service. Similar to email, for instance. Imagine email not being implementable by each and everyone with a webserver. That would, obviously, be very bad. Or would it? So if Wave claims to be the new black email+, it can not only depend on Google as an organization, can it? As cloudy as it may be. As I hear, the open part of the waveprotocol is not yet very wave-ey. Which is sad. I hope, that point, too, improves.

Since I lowered my expectations, though, from a very high level, I find it a quite useful tool. I hope, the Google Wave developers will manage to make it a bit faster, though. The user experience is definitely lacking there.

Another reason for my disappointment probably was, that my experience is based on having only a few people to communicate with. At first, there where my friends. Most of them are quite savvy with communication, so we fiddled a bit, but we did not have much to collaborate on, since we live so far apart and don't really have projects we are working together on right now. But more and more people got on Wave, and in the last week I made contact with librarians in Norway, and not least (most of the) co-organizers of and speakers at the "Free and Open Libraries" conference about F(L)OSS software in libraries next week in Bergen, Norway. So we started collaborating, and suddenly the whole map inclusion in wave made a whole lot more sense.

The second  most interesting thing are public waves. I have searched for waves matching my temporary, or overall professional or private interest. I found interesting waves:

Open wave for librarians using Wave

Female Geeks

NaNoWriMo

Hackerspaces FAQ

And many more public waves. Something that I did not find, though, was a public wave for knitters, and it took off very fast from zero to 101 wavers contributing as of today.

Knitters on Waves

Although in the more tech-savvy wave topics people try to figure out things before they participate, many of they waves with specific topics end up becoming undertaken by people take about the Google Wave sandbox and about figuring things while they are at it. This is tiring, and I find myself not participating anymore where Waves become so bloated and cluttered with dozens or even sometimes hundreds of such messages.

What has not happened yet is the development of a certain code of behaviour, what people called "netiquette" (or something) before for this service. Some places people are concerned about it. Most places they are not. Gina Trapani and Adam Pash from Lifehacker have written the Complete Guide to Google Wave. And there is probably more to come. Not only explanations, but also features.

I am still waiting for things to get more exciting. I didn't use twitter much the first six months I had my account, and now I twitter a lot. With all the tummy-ache that follows, relying on a centralized server. So I really hope it grows on me, because XMPP is great, and I think it could become very useful.

Due to a conference, which was happening today and yesterday, I had to prepare a bunch of stuff to it on wednesday. And I was very involved with the library part of the conference yesterday. So I did not get any writing done yesterday, and only very little on wednesday. But after a private little write-a-t(h)on tonight I almost catched up to the word count aim of today. I got 8.052 words today, and the aim in the calendar shows me I should have 8335, if I was to write an equal port of word every day. So I am short of less than 300 words before the weekend, I am set up with a pushy software, that teases and nags me to write, once I sit down and start. I would say, I am pretty well set to finish this time, if I keep up with the speed and discipline. So far it has not been too hard. With my average writing speed, 3334 word a day can be done in 1 - 1 1/2 hours.

Well, lets not talk of the content, I guess, I am more on the cheesy side there. However, it is fun, and I added the first facepalm after the first 7758 words.

There has been kissing, biting and sucking, but noone has died yet. I can tell you, however, that one or two tax bureaucrats will die a violent and painful death very soon. In my novel. Oh yes.